Showing posts with label father_2_be. Show all posts
Showing posts with label father_2_be. Show all posts

Friday, 8 April 2011

Father_2_be?....you better believe it!


When we decided a year go, to start a family, I still never really believed it would happen. So when we discovered that after only 9 months of trying we had been successful and that little indicator displayed 'Pregnant 2-3 weeks' it still didn’t seem real.

We had been on holiday to India, the wife had taken a course of antibiotics before we travelled, had numerous servings of Pâté, a fair few vodkas and had even been riding on an elephant, all of which are probably on the 'Don’t do if pregnant' list. On the 2nd week into our holiday we started to realise that the possibility was a very BIG possibility. We waited until we got home to do the test and we decided to keep it a secret at least until the first Dr's appointment.

I didn’t go with her to the first appointment. We knew from friend’s experiences, this would just be a formality. Fill in some paperwork, maybe pee in a pot and bobs your uncle. What I didn’t expect is to be told all the Dr did was say congratulations and say there will be a midwife appointment would be sent through the post. A little bit of an anticlimax if you ask me and a little impersonal. Christine actually came home and took another home test just to make sure it still said positive!

Between that and the next appointment it’s still felt a but surreal. There was no physical sign that there was a baby growing in there, nor were there many symptoms.

At the first midwife appointment, again this was just filling in paperwork, checking weight, blood pressure ect, still no actual test to show that she was actually pregnant. It sounds silly to say that, but I imagined with all the time and money that is spent on this process, you would think they would ask you to take some sort of simple test?

When we attended the first scan, it was exactly what I had expected. The staff were courteous, helpful and straight the point. As she lay with jelly all over her stomach they found the baby fairly easily. What I appreciated the most is that although their first concern was dealing with Christine, they were really good at speaking to us both and showing us both as much as we could make out even at that early stage. We were dated at 10 weeks 5 days and told everything looked good.

Due to her BMI, she was referred to a consultant. Again we didn’t think it would be worth me taking time off to attend. Again we thought this would be paperwork and a quick check-up for the mum-to-be. Sadly we were wrong. This appointment gave her the first opportunity to hear the heartbeat of our little baby. Although I was really disappointed, it cheered me up when I saw how happy it had made Christine.

When the next midwife appointment came through, there was no chance I was missing it this time! Luckily the appointment and the 20 weeks scan were made for the same week, so we had plenty to look forward to.

Leading up to the second midwife appointment and the 20 week scan I was really nervous. I have always been a ‘glass have empty’ person, so all through this journey so far I have been nervous that something would go wrong. This wasn’t helped by reading many stories about other women who had issues and even suffered the worst. My recommendation to anybody is that if you intend to read other peoples stories even my own, is that everybody is different and no matter what your beliefs, what will be will be.

The week had finally arrived; on Tuesday we attended our local doctors to see the midwife. Again they were attentive to Christine but I also felt they were not ignoring me which I was very grateful for. After what seems like the obligatory paperwork, the moment I had been waiting for finally arrives. Christine hopped onto the bed and the midwife checked the heartbeat.

To say this moment was amazing is such an understatement. I am but a simple man and to think there is a life growing inside my beautiful wife blows my mind, so to hear this little heart beating definitely brought a lump to my throat. After the midwife gave the OK, we both went our separate ways back to our respective workplaces but I am not sure how much work I actually got done, because all I could think about was the little bit of magic that was going on.

I am writing this on the eve of our 20 week scan and although another 20 weeks seems such a long time, I look forward to every step of the way.

Thursday, 7 April 2011

Father_2_be?...eventually!

Firstly, a little bit about me:
*Stands up in front of the group*. My names Lewis Ackroyd and I will be 29 when I become a father in August 2011.

I married Christine at 23 and thought that the next logical step would be kids. 
We had our own home, we were extremely happy together, but one thing stood in our way......The woman I loved with all my heart told me she had no desire to become a mother.
Her opinion went from “in the future” to “No thanks”. Some people at that stage may have made the decision to separate; after all, we both wanted different futures, she wanted a life of holidays and nights out, I wanted a little one to look after, teach wrong from right and all the other things that come with bringing life into this world. Separation however never crossed my mind, after all I married her for love not her uterus!

The idea of not having kids hit me hard; I always believed that eventually I would be a dad so the realisation of NEVER having kids really brought me down. Eventually though, I came to the realisation that even though I wouldn’t have kids, I was still very lucky in life. I had a beautiful wife who loved me dearly; we had our own house, good jobs and were very happy.
In 2010 everything changed. I don’t know if it was having friends with babies or simply the biological clock kicking in but in February we had the first serious discussion about parenthood. After about a month of me constantly asking “Are you sure”, we were officially trying to conceive.

....more to follow!

Tuesday, 5 April 2011

First-time-daddy? First-time-blogger!

I have been asked for a while now, why I dont do a blog.
I have used Twitter since around January, to talk about my feelings and experience during our pregnancy.
Over the next few days I will introduce myself and give you a few details on whats happened so-far in the first 20 weeks!

All comments welcome.